West Bank Cafe
by Jimaine
Summary: What happens to XMen between death and undeathressurection? Answer: they go to Thunderbird's West Bank Cafe! Be prepared for the whole gang: Amanda, Thunderbird and of course, Jean Grey!


Disclaimer: me no own X-Men

A/N: Just in case you didn't know . . .

-Amanda Sefton/Jimaine Szardos: Kurt Wagner's foster-sister, sweetheart and true love. Also a sorceress.

-Candy Southern: Warren Worthington III's girlfriend who broke up with him and then turned the X-Men over to the Phalanx.

-Alytis Forrester: Lee, one of Scott's ex-girlfriend from the time between Dark Phoenix and Madelyn Pryor.

-Colleen: One of Scott's ex-girlfriends from the time between Dark Phoenix and Madelyn Pryor.

-John Proudstar: Thunderbird, killed in a plane crash with Count Nefaria in his third issue.

-Birdy: assassin, telepathic assisstant to Victor Creed, better known as Sabretooth.

-Elektra: Matt Murdock (Daredevil)'s one-time girlfriend, Ninja assassin.

-Margali Szardos: Jimaine and Stefan Szardos mother, a very powerful sorceress who took Kurt in when she found him as an infant and allowed him to be raised by the Romany (gypsies). Is also about ten feet tall and has ram horns.

To the west bank, then, Anubis!

"NOOOOOO!!!!"

The sounds of someone else's anguish faded as the world dimmed, replaced with an annoyingly bright white light.

She was dead.

Then, to her surprise, the light moved to her left and she traveled not away from it, but obliquely to the right. A seventies-style coffeehouse came into view in front of her with WEST BANK CAFÉ in large neon green letters on the roof. She ceased to fly/float through this world of three dimensions and was suddenly upright enough to walk through the café's door.

There was a sudden hush when she walked in, as if the various characters inside were summing her up. Then they mostly looked away, all but one . . .

"Amanda!" an excited voice cried. "I _knew_ we'd be seeing you soon. See, I told you, Lee. Pay up!" the person attached to the excited voice was none other than Warren's supposedly deceased turncoat girlfriend Candy Southern. The woman she was addressing was someone Amanda Sefton barely recognized, a blond by the name of Alytis Forrester. A third woman was also sitting at the table Candy and Lee shared, a brunette whom Amanda also recognized as another one of Scott's lovers, Colleen.

When Lee apparently handed over the amount their bet had been for, Candy hurried over to the severely confused sorceress. "Candy - where are we? What's going on? And I thought - the Phalanx- "

"Yes yes yes," the black woman dismissed that storyline with a wave of her hand. "I know. I turned traitor on the X-Men and joined the Phalanx, who were summarily destroyed. Would I be here if Marvel didn't have plans for me?"

The blond was stunned. "Candy - I don't - "

"Aw, Candy, cut it out. You've got a newbie here, give the girl a break. C'mere, Sefton. Have a drink," the spandex-clad man behind the counter gestured. "What? You don't trust me? As dishonest a sorceress as you are, you should know that an Apache warrior has his honor."

All of a sudden, Amanda recognized the man from one of Kurt's photographs.

"Oh, gods, you're Thunderbird!" she screeched. This, of course, prompted snickering and a pair of women in a corner booth who couldn't seem to stop laughing. John Proudstar grinned.

"I get that a lot, Miss Sefton, don't worry. Now. Tea. And a side dish of explanation," Thunderbird coaxed. Candy just rolled her eyes and dragged the other woman over and sat her down at the bar. "Now, see Miss Sefton, it's like this," Thunderbird explained. "Marvel enjoys killing off their characters. It's a way to keep a series alive, although that's some skewed logic there. So, if they intend that character to come back (and they usually do), they end up here. Or if they weren't killed, but were a minor character that's been summarily forgotten, you eventually end up here too. Like Lee and Colleen over there. You, Candy, and most of the others in here, however, have a part in Marvels future. So you're not dead. You ended up here, at the West Bank Café, because you're an X-Men titles character. Mind, characters from all titles are welcome, but if you're X-Men, you end up here. Take Elektra over there," Thunderbird pointed to the red-clad assassin who was chatting amiably with a blond in their corner booth, apparently having gotten over their fit of laughter. "She's been 'Born Again' a few times, so when a fellow female assassin showed up, so did she. Besides, the woman needed someone to talk to. So did Birdy, for that matter."

"That's Birdy?" Amanda whispered, finally working up the courage to speak. "Sabretooth's telepath?"

_*And proud of it, "Jimi". Don't pretend you haven't been to the gutter and back, with or without your demonic little X-Man,_* the telepath shot. Amanda flinched. _*Try to remember how you died, hon. I'm sure you won't like it_.*

"Aw, don't pay attention to the assassins in the corner," John dismissed the pair. "They both excel in head games. If this weren't _my_ joint they'd be running the place."

But something was bothering Amanda. It was what Birdy 'said' - _Try to remember how you died, hon_. "Thunderbird," she started.

"John, Miss Sefton. Been here too long to use that codename, as I expect I'll need a new one whenever Marvel decides to bring me out."

"Amanda, then, John. Why can't I remember how I died?"

John and Candy exchanged a Look. It was Candy who answered. "You will, Amanda, but you haven't quite accepted that you're dead. You have to accept being dead before going back, you know."

"Great!" Amanda flung up her hands and sulked over her tea.

Less than a week later . . . 

"Okay. I'm dead. There is no other explanation," Amanda was babbling. Birdy and Elektra were laughing hysterically at her reaction, as were Lee and Colleen.

"Hey, don't worry, girl," Lee nudged her with an elbow. Cyclops' ex-girlfriends, Candy and the two assassins had adopted Amanda and a bigger booth. "Cyke don't know - the one time he was in here _she_ wasn't, and Colleen and I berated him enough for leaving us that he never, ever wants to come back." Colleen grinned evilly in agreement.

The _she_ they referred to was, of course, the frequently dead Jean Grey. Who seemed to have forgotten that there was a 'Summers' attached to her last name and was currently playing tonsil-hockey with Thunderbird over the counter.

"Nice to be back, hon," she purred when they came up for air.

John moved on to her neck, and Amanda was certain she was going to come back to life with a hickey. "Nice to have you back," he whispered just as they vanished into a back room.

Amanda shuddered.

This, of course, just set Elektra and Birdy off again, and this time the others joined in whole-heartedly. Birdy was actually the first to recover. "Don't worry, sorce. When she comes back to life, she won't remember a thing. The memories of what happens in West Bank Café are unique to West Bank Café."

Ignoring the use of a new and annoying nickname the assassins had thought up - sorce, short for sorceress - Amanda remembered something. "That reminds me. Why the West Bank Café? I don't get the name."

"It comes from Egyptian mythology," Colleen spoke up for the first time. "The dead are escorted to the west bank of the Nile to be judged, and the west bank was the sacred territory of the gods. Naturally, it's named for the first part."

Amanda nodded. That made sense, now that she thought about it.

Eventually, the conversation swung around to the most typical topic of conversation in the Café - how do you think you'll be brought back, and why?

"I'm getting Vic from Forge," Birdy commented. "He doesn't do confinement."

Candy shook her head. "How can you be so smitten with that walking nuthouse, Birdy? You even let him name you - you admit you've forgotten any other name you've ever gone by!"

The telepath shrugged. "No accounting for taste, I guess. But you wouldn't know - you never really fell for your chosen costume."

Candy only shrugged. "Well, Warren's nice and all, but he's sort of more like a brother."

"Well, we all know who fell the hardest of all for her costume," Elektra's sultry voice commented. "Care to put in your bit, Jimaine?"

Amanda flinched at the use of the name she'd grown up with. Nowadays only Margali called her daughter that, and then only the rare times she saw the more powerful sorceress. For all she knew, Margali might well be dead.

Or - 'dead'.

"Amanda," she corrected, feeling a little foolish for it. Elektra was an imposing person. "And yes. I fell for my 'costume'. I do still and always have loved Kurt Wagner."

With that announcement the West Bank Café faded around Amanda, reminiscent of when she'd died. The white light still loomed but didn't beckon as she traveled away from it. Amanda found that the most important thing about going back wasn't that she would live again.

It was that she would live to see Kurt again.

Back at the Café . . .

Birdy grinned. "Hah! I knew it! All she had to do was admit she loved him, and Marvel had a use for her!" the telepath pumped a victory fist. Elektra shot an annoyed look at her fellow assassin.

"You are too enthusiastic for an assassin," the Daredevil femme fatale muttered.

"Hey, I've worked under 'enthusiastic', Elektra, and you ain't seen that."

_*Would you cut it out?_* came an annoyed telepathic request by way of Jean Grey. _*I can't block the five of you together. I get little enough time here anyway, and I'd like to _enjoy_ what I have left!_*

That set the whole table laughing.


End file.
